OCD Awareness - Mental Health Series #1
"You don't have to learn how to control your thoughts; you just have to stop letting them control you."
What's the first thing that pops into your head when you hear "OCD"? Cleanliness and hand washing? Neatly organised coloured pencils in rainbow order? Habits like turning switches off or double checking that you haven't left your hair straighteners on? These are often things that people perceive to be "so OCD", but the reality of the disorder is very different. These things may be part of some people's rituals or compulsions, but the stereotype of super-clean-hand-washing-germaphobe-with-quirky-habits is far from the truth!
One of the most common misconceptions about OCD is that OCD is about being clean/neat/tidy.
As I've already mentioned, OCD is not purely about cleanliness. For some people, compulsive cleaning may be part of their rituals, however for many people (myself included), being clean or neat plays no part in their OCD. (You only have to look at my room to confirm that I am NOT a neat person.) For sufferers who do have obsessions and compulsions centred around being clean, it is very different to the common view that most people have in that the sufferer enjoys cleaning. This isn't the case. For people with OCD, it's more like "I have to clean this thing/do this ritual/tidy this room or the world is going to fall apart and I might die". Not particularly enjoyable. It's a constant internal stream of "what ifs" and relentless inner debating whilst putting on an "I'm fine" face and convincing the world that you're fine, thank you very much, now leave me alone.
Another thing that people don't seem to realise is that OCD is not so much about the rituals, such as cleaning, sorting, tapping, praying, clicking, whatever makes your head quiet. The biggest "driving force" of OCD is the obsessional thoughts, commonly known as intrusive thoughts. Everyone gets intrusive thoughts, not just individuals with OCD. What's different is how you respond to the thoughts. I'm sure most people sometimes get random thoughts pop into their heads, like "I could throw my phone out the window" or "I could push someone down these stairs right now". For a non-sufferer, these thoughts are brushed away and forgotten about, because why would you dwell on such an illogical thought? However, for OCD sufferers. these thoughts gets stuck in their head and played on repeat. Ruminating on intrusive thoughts often goes along the lines of-
"I could be a murderer. No, don't be stupid. It's highly unlikely. Yeah, but what if I am? Well I haven't killed anyone, so I'm not a murderer yet. Not yet, so I still could. Have I ever thought about killing someone? Oh god, I probably have. That means I'm going to be a murderer. Normal people don't think they are going to be murderers which means I am going to be a murderer." "If I even have to reassure myself that I'm not a murderer, it's likely I actually am a murderer and I'm trying to convince myself otherwise" etc etc etc. It's illogical and overwhelming and relentless.
Recovering from OCD is possible, depending on the severity of the disorder and the help you are provided to aid your recovery. Therapies such as CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) can be useful for some sufferers, as well as exposure therapy and hypnotherapy. From personal experience, I would not say I am recovered from OCD but there are times where I have suffered less and my OCD seems to be at bay. The biggest piece of advice I have if you are suffering is to not fight the thoughts, accept them instead. It is scary to accept them, but if you do, your OCD will quieten down. For example, at the moment I struggle with believing I have anorexia. So. a thought might be-
"I don't have anorexia and I shouldn't be here. I'm a fake and I'm fine."
Helpful Resources-
Mind (http://www.mind.org.uk/)
OCD-UK (http://www.ocduk.org/)
Ellen's OCD Blog (https://ellensocdblog.com/)
